"You've got to feel sorry for Frank Arnesen. Apropos nothing then, what was that woman going to do with those 10 doves had Michael Jackson been found guilty?" - Roger Bejinde, Putney. "Re: the plea in yesterday's Fiver letters for new subjects. oh why bother? A million other Fiver readers are certain to beat me to the obvious gag" - Graham Martin (and a million other Fiver readers). "Re: yesterday's letter from Raymond Herlihy in which he wrote: 'Why are nearly all letters (Fiver letters passim) in reference to ones from the previous days?' My guess is that. The saloon did not follow until the following year" - Liam Whelan. You hacks just can't be bothered with your research, can you? The Focus replaced the old Escort in October 98 but only in hatchback form. "Re: the Fiver's mention of a 1998 Ford Focus Saloon in yesterday's news in brief. The men behind the bunny started out as DJs in the Crazy Horse in Nuneaton, a town with few living stars left, seeing as George Eliot, Larry Grayson and Mary Whitehouse have all passed to the other side" - Nathan Walker, East Yorkshire. "I know it is the most stupid thing I could ever do, but I can't let Rotherham claim Jive Bunny (yesterday's Fiver letters) for their Chuckle Brothers-headlining benefit gig. Norway defender Claus Lundekvam has confirmed he is keen to join his old boss Gordon Strachan at Celtic, but Southampton won't let him go for a penny less than £700,000.Īnd Norwich have agreed to reverse their opening fixture of next season and stage the game against Coventry at Carrow Road, subject to approval from some men in blazers. Midfielder Darren will leave Bongo FC for the Hawthorns and £1.5m. He's over there sweet-talking Internazionale midfielder Belozoglu Emre into a move to Newcastle. Graeme Souness's love affair with Turkey hasn't ended. Norwich, Watford and Brighton are hunkered down in the gutter, looking tear-stained and out of puff. Ipswich have breasted the tape in the race to sign Swindon striker Sam Parkin for an undisclosed fee. Good news for bland MOR-purveyor and Boro fan Chris Rea - Norwich stopper Robert Green could be calling the Riverside Stadium home next season.ĭavid Cooper (Tuesday's Fiver letters) will be thrilled to hear that Escape To Victory stars Mike Summerbee and Pele are coming out of retirement to join Ronaldinho at Man City next season.ĭvd O'Lry to Everton's Alan Stubbs: "Rm 4u at Vlla"Īfter spotting sporting director Frank Arnesen aboard Roman Abramovich's yacht, Spurs have given Chelsea until noon tomorrow to cough up some compo. Good news for bland MOR-purveyor and Man Utd fan Chris Rea - Jorge Andrade isn't overly keen on a move to Newcastle, but likes the cut of Old Trafford's sward. Well, £48m in used tens and twenties, plus one used Hernan Crespo. Those of us at Real Madrid are really looking forward to that and he will be a really important 'signing' for us as we prepare for next season" - Real Madrid director of football Arrigo Sacchi has not forgotten Jonathan Woodgate, even if you have.Ĭhelsea have offered AC Milan a whopping £57m for Andriy Shevchenko. "The doctors say he will make a full recovery. Want to know who you're side's playing on the first day of the season? Click to find out. "We are where we are and we've got to get our heads around it and get on with it," he said, with all the enthusiasm of a fat kid being made to climb a gym rope in his vest and Y-fronts. "Every single game is going to be hard," shuddered Gary Megson, consulting his map, as nearby a pool of warm liquid appeared around Swansea's feet. They'll be hosting Huddersfield Town on the first day of the season in League One, followed by a trip to Walsall. "I told Paul and I can't repeat his reply." St Glenn of Hoddle may also have blasphemed upon discovering he's got an opening-day reunion at his old club Southampton to look forward to, when Wolves will travel to St Mary's to welcome Harry Redknapp and his new sidekick, English Lions coach Clive Woodward, to the Championship.Īt the other end of the playground, where boss-eyed kids covered in snot and eczema swap stones and poke dead birds with sticks, former in-crowders Nottingham Forest are surveying their surroundings with mortification. "When we found out our first and last game it was like all our Christmases had come at once," shrieked masochistic chief exec Brenda Spencer, whose appetite for pain appears to know no bounds. With a hiding at Highbury in store on May 7th, survival will depend on their ability to pick up a few points out of the 36 matches in between. What's more, Wigan's season has even been given a fairytale ending too.
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